More Musings on Most Feared Woman

After publishing my blog post on a political woman not requiring validation, I thought it would be useful to reflect on a spiritual woman not requiring validation.

Who might that woman be? Any one of the women around you. Every one of the women. Are you aware of the spiritual life of the women in your life?

When we express with and from our soul, we are connected to our depths. We often hide what resides there ~ as though it were a part of us that needed protection instead of being the part that armors by disarming.

Men are not expected to require validation. In my experience, many probably could use it. Men want validation from other men and from the women in their lives as much as women want it. It's just that they request or demand it in different ways.

A woman who does not require validation is a woman of strength. In the spiritual sense, she is someone who does not fear what comes her way. She recognizes herself in every attacker as completely as she knows that she has nothing in common with that person. She finds laughter in the midst of difficulties and focuses on the needs and accomplishments of others as much as or more than her own. She does not need another person to tell her any of these things.... she knows in her depths who she is and what she is capable of.

We often name those women saints. Whether through a formal process or not, we recognize the individual women as holy and their lives as profound. Yet, if we look deeply enough at ourselves and our women companions, we catch glimpses of those holy moments in ourselves and those companions. We find grace in not needing validation, in knowing that who we are and what we do belongs. Those moments save us.

How do you find validation? Do you expect it from others? want it from them? How do you find it in yourself? Do you consciously validate others? If so, what does that look like? If not, why not? Do you fear the women who do not require your validation to proceed with their lives?

Becoming? or Unbecoming?

There are times and days when the place where I want to be in my journey seems a long ways off.... at the very least, in a neighboring solar system if not even in another universe. It feels out of reach ~ unattainable.

When this quote popped up, I realized the disconnected, dissonant feeling surrounding disparate pieces of who and what I already am. Those segments of me seem almost stuck in a position ~ like a standard transmission without a clutch ~ grinding and hiccuping as I attempt a shift.

How do I determine what is truly ME? Some pieces are tied to words and definitions that keep me stuck: friend, sister, mother, teacher, writer, celebrant..... the definitions in particular alter uneasily and slowly.

Even the term stuck doesn't quite fit ~~~ like being stranded midstream with words whose definitions feel tight or sloppy or cumbersome. Like chili made with a smidge too much or too little spice: tasty yet slightly off.

What I love is the thought of being in the process of unbecoming..... shifting how I think about myself and my world.... allowing the flow of creativity to carry me onward. My only cringe is when I consider that who I've been is not who I was meant to be. I don't believe that. I've been what I was meant to be all along.... it's currently time for a change.

Are you still becoming? or perhaps even unbecoming? unwinding the threads of you that have come loose? How do you see yourself? What words describe you? Which words are you redefining? Which are you discovering anew? Which are you stepping into?

Aries Full Moon

This weekend's full moon has many aspects to it. It's called a Hunter's Moon ~ having the potential to be colored orange-red. It is also a perigee moon, a supermoon, at its closest point to Earth.

In astrological terms, it rises in the sign of Aries, making it about taking action and declaring what you stand for as well as what you choose to leave behind.

This full moon conjuncts Uranus ~ the rebel, awakener and liberator bringing often unsettling change ~ and Eris ~ the feminine warrior kicking serious wake-it-up butt in the social justice arena. This moon is about taking courageous stands, not blasting anger or even blame. Move through the fiery energy fully awake, taking responsibility and being creative as you go.

The asteroid Ceres is at 29 degrees Aries, the karmic completion degree. The Great Mother brings up family, environment, safety and security. These are deeply emotional places to visit. Feel the deepest emotions, those generally repressed like anger, grief, pain. Allowing them to be exposed and felt helps them to heal.

Although sometimes difficult to consider, people and events in your life teaches you more about yourself and the journey of your life. This Aries Full Moon may bring all that and more, perhaps unexpectedly, to the surface in order to teach and heal you.

 Besides personal life events, do you notice anything in the news lately reflecting these motifs? This energy is bubbling up through our entire culture.

Seize the Day

I recall hearing the phrase carpe diem from early childhood. My father and uncles had been in the armed forces. It was phrase they lived by while in combat. They knew it was possible they would not survive to see another day.

Through most of my adult life, it was a phrase I avoided. Not the sentiment of living each day to the fullest, but the simple Latin statement. I had grown to attach it to the violence of war.

Recently, I heard carpe diem slipping into my mind more and more often. Like a rock found on the side of a familiar path, I grabbed them up, turned them over and inspected them. I thought I knew them, knew what they were made of, knew how they were formed ~ but I discovered I only knew them in part. This most recent handling of them brought out a new question: What did carpe diem mean to me now?

What surfaced was a deeper understanding of the meaning to my parents' generation. The tenderness and vulnerability of life. The possibility, even likelihood, of change ~ including death. Grasping for the vitality existing in the moment, in today, because tomorrow was promised to no one.

When I see the word plastered on cards, t-shirts, journals, buttons and stickers, I resist it. My own tender and vulnerable view of time, of the world around me, of the often shaky balance of the world leaves me wondering if my energy reflects that of others viewing the same item. Or are they seeing it as a reflection of their own desire to have, to grab, to claim everything they want? I pause with a whisper of gratitude to those men, now gone from this life, who introduced me to carpe diem.

What do you think of when you see or hear carpe diem? How does it meld with your world view? or does it? To what in your life could you apply this principle?

Most Feared Woman

No matter where you are in today's culture, it's obvious that there remain narrowly defined roles and rules for women. In some regions and countries, it may appear women have freedom, but that's deceptive.

As I write this, a strong, dedicated, qualified woman (Hillary Clinton) is running for U.S. President. Challenges arise which no man running for that office ever received. Ever. No matter the political party affiliation.

Upon reading this quote, truth dawned on me. She's not looking for validation from anyone. She's moving forward in the world with confidence and power. That scares many men, and a number of women.

There have been two Presidential debates. Her opponent (Donald Trump) used many varied and extensive intimidation tactics: looming presence behind her, talking over her, accusing her of having 'hate in her heart' (as though he would know!). One of the best memes I've seen underscores the above quote: Once again, we have a strong, highly qualified woman who has to compete for a position with a man who is nowhere near her in competency. I look forward to the day when this no longer happens.

How do you respond to a woman who does not require validation? Why would she be feared? How can you help reduce the imbalance in competition? How might this be important for our daughters and granddaughters? for our sons and grandsons? for all future generations?

Lessons from a Phone Theft

A couple of weeks ago, my phone was stolen. I was out at a bar, a music venue, to be entertained by some friends. I put my phone down on a table and put my purse on top of it. A woman celebrating her 40th birthday invited me to partake of the taco bar in the next room. Picking up my purse, I went into the room and quickly loaded my plate and returned. I was gone less than 5 minutes.

After eating, I started looking for my phone. I thought it had to be in my purse. It wasn't. I went back out to the car to see if I had left it in there. Nope. Returned to the previous place where friends were playing music. Not there either. I recalled that when leaving the first place, I considered putting the phone on the roof of the car. By this time I was frantic. I must have done something. The phone must be somewhere close.

Of course, since it was my responsibility, no matter what happened to it, I was blaming myself. I felt horrible ~ the phone was only a couple of months old.

Once home, I reported the stolen phone to the phone provider. I found out the next day that since it was on a family data plan, it could be tracked. I also decided to let go of the self-blame. This was certainly a first-world problem. More than that, no matter what happened to it or why, it wasn't worth my health and stress.

With the help of my significant other, we began tracking it. It showed up miles away from home, miles away from either music venue. It stayed in that place for nearly a full day. As we were driving to put up reward posters in the neighborhood, I checked again for the phone's location. It was miles away from where it had been. We chose to play amateur sleuths and followed the tracking. It led to a restaurant. When we asked the people in the restaurant if they'd be willing to keep one of our posters and let us know if they saw it, they agreed. After telling all their staff about it, someone asked how we knew it was there. The manager replied that we had tracked it there. Shortly afterward the signal went dead.

The next day, I reconnected my old phone to our service. That night, prior to closing, a tech from our phone carrier called me to let me know that a phone connected to my cell number had been turned in by someone who had been asked by the thief to hack it. I could come in the next day to pick it up.... which I gladly did!

I learned several things through all this ~ besides making sure my phone is with me at all times and that there are ways to track missing phones. I learned that blaming myself didn't change anything. As a matter of fact, if I hadn't been winding my stress level up, I may have realized sooner that it had been stolen ~ and checked around more closely. I'm fortunate enough to afford a cell phone. Counting my blessings was far more helpful to my stress level! Follow the fun ~ that's what playing amateur sleuths with my significant other became ~ fun. Finally, once I relaxed, the Universe could flow through me in a more fluid fashion. I was fortunate to get my phone back with only the SIM card gone. By the time it did, three and a half days after being stolen, the thing that was my phone went back to being just a thing.

Have you ever had something stolen or lost? How did you respond? Did you blame yourself? or someone else? How long did it take to replace or return? What do you feel now, thinking back on that situation?

September Next Steps

Mythical Goddess Tarot ~ Holloway & Skaggs

From the Guide:

The Maiden of Fire is the wild woman who burns through the status quo with her heart of fire. She releases the binds to the old and transmutes the mundane outmoded form into the New Earth. She is unattached to the past, bringing innovation and cutting edge perspective.
This revolutionary Goddess of fire is here to assist you in the fiery release of all that shackles you to the past and outmoded form. You are ready for her pure flame to ignite your passion to ascend in frequency that you may change, heal and express your untamed essence. She brings the revolutionary power of change to you, inviting you to step into your true radiance and shine the light for others!

This week, we experienced a New Moon Solar Eclipse in Virgo. Whew! Lots of energy opening up there. Lots of opening up energy too ~ patterns that have served us for the past six months slipping out the gateway; new patterns settling in for the next six months. As the saying goes: Be careful what you wish for...... This is a time for setting those wishes in motion. A time to rework and reorganize our belief and value systems. A time to reweave, reconnect and restructure our connection to the web of life around us.

As I focused on the Tarot cards today, I simply asked for the energy that I would need to move forward from here. The Maiden of Fire ~ Revolution Herself ~ showed up. Reading the information from the Guide, I recognized that She is the Next Step for me ~~ precisely what I need to move forward after the New Moon Solar Eclipse. Someone Who will help me release the chains and dedications of the past, stand fully in the present moment, and move cleanly into the future. I want to focus my energy in each place in turn ~ until the form of what I'm calling forth reveals itself.

How is the New Moon Solar Eclipse touching your life? What are you letting go? What are you seeding? What do you want to see more of in your life? Who is showing up to help you? How will you define your next step? Where are you focusing your energy?