Flower or Weed?

Today's Teabag Tarot brought many recent discussions to mind. We've discussed the recent elections which brings out a full range of vocalized opinions. We've discussed various circles from family to friends to work buddies ~ and all the intricacies of being with and around them. We've discussed the weather, the traffic, the latest store closure or opening. We've discussed how to prepare turkey and what to put into the dressing and which bell-ringers should or should not be singing holiday songs. In other words, every possible topic under the sun.

As each topic arises and is discussed, everyone's personal opinion about it surfaces as well. Although some topics, such as the elections, may bring out fierce commentaries, most of them have the potential to create impassioned statements.

One topic thoroughly discussed in the past week was the preparation of the Thanksgiving turkey ~ specifically, the preparation of the dressing. Savory? Sweet? Giblets? Oyster? In the turkey? Separate? The list of topics goes on forever. Everyone has an opinion, a preference, and wants to be heard.

So ~ in the midst of these discussions, this Teabag Tarot appears: The difference between a flower and a week is a judgment. I paused in my listening to the specific words. Each person has their point of view. For one person, adding the giblets was the flower and for the other person, it was the weed. Each has their position, their judgment, and was not interested in budging from that spot.

I thought about other conversations I'd participated in or listened to. Most of them remained civil even when strongly different opinions surfaced. The Teabag Tarot revealed the core of the discourse: what we stand on is simply our judgment. It's good to reflect on that ~ and on the similarity we share with our opponent as we do.

How many discussions have you had today ~ or this week ~ where someone changed their position? How strongly did you feel about your flower? their weed? About what topics are you most passionate? Which topics matter less?

Become a Lion

A high school teacher gave her students an activity at the end of the year. She instructed them to write their opinions of each other on pieces of paper and share them anonymously. It was a strong focus on the opinions of others. At the end of class, one young woman tearfully shared with the teacher that some of the students wrote horrible things about her. The teacher's response: "Maybe you should think about it; maybe there is something to what they're saying."

It's difficult for youth to become lions, to roar in the face of others' opinions, especially if those opinions are reinforced by a trusted adult. It's not much easier for those of us who are older either. Especially since we often trust those who offer the opinions. Part of our social nature is wanting to be good citizens, to think well of others and to have others to think well of us. Society operates smoothly because of that desire. Yet we must temper the strength of that desire so it doesn't box us in, provide a sense of not belonging, stop us from embracing our individuality and unique expression.

I love the sense of freedom when I let go of that particular concern. The opportunity to stand aside from the crowd, to be a totally singular expression of humanity, is that roar within my heart. My goal for the remainder of the year is to remain as creatively myself as I can.

How do you express your creativity? Do the opinions of others affect you? (be honest!) How? What can you do to diminish the effect?