Eye of the Divine

©2015 ML Monroe

For at least the past month, I have had the extraordinary experience of sitting in the Cave of the Goddess. Note that I did not say resting or sleeping. Although the activity was not physical, there was much happening in that deep, dark place.

Over and over again, soft shudders rippled through my body ~ when I heard unidentified noises and my imagination took me to even darker places; when I recalled the dear ones who died in the recent or distant past and my heart once again broke with grief; when I felt a soft caress pass over an exposed hand or cheek and my connection with the Divine grew more intimate.

Over and over again, my mind grappled with words that were not mine, with words to express concepts that had no words, with silence beyond all words. I am a creature of words and my grappling was, and is, a nearly physical ache.

This Cave exists in many different places, myths and cultures. Sometimes it is an actual opening in rock; sometimes it is a built structure of enclosure, quiet and darkness. Always, it's a place for Seer and Prophet, Sibyl and Oracle. The Cave of Elijah in Israel. The temple of the Pythia in Delphi. The Ailwee Bear Caves in Ireland. Mary Magdalene spending her last years in a cave. The Anchorage of Julian of Norwich. The Actun Tunichil Muknal Cave in Belize. The Elephanta Caves in India. The Dambulla Cave in Sri Lanka. The Sof Omar Caves in Ethiopia. All mythic, all holy to a variety of belief systems.

Venturing forth from my personal Cave of the Goddess, I encountered the dark sky and lovely moon and clouds. Clearly, in an amazing veiled form, was the face of the Divine ~ the Moon as the Light-providing Eye. The Face shifted from male to female and back again ~ the Face of the Ineffable Light. It's not clear that my time in the Cave is complete. For now, I'm happy to bask in the Moonlight and wait.

What do you see in the image above? What is your Cave? Where do you feel most at home? How do you encounter the Divine? How do you encounter the darkness and quiet of the Cave?

When I Grow Old

My life has been blessed by a series of events ~ or perhaps more truly, a splattering of events ~ that have led me to ponder life as a Crone.
Here is my story:

I have met myself as an old woman,
an impossibly old woman,
living inside
an impossibly old, hollowed out tree....
in another lifetime.
She is/I am
strong,
healing,
determined.
A shape-shifter.
A spirit walker.
A seer, in every sense of the word.
I feel her within me.
I feel me within her.
I am afraid.
I am fearless.
I know nothing.
I apprehend all of life.
I hear the voices of the stars.
I dance to the music of the spheres.

I feel that old woman within me.... ever since she first showed up, in a journey, in a dream, in a conversation, more than 3 years ago. She shows herself when I need to see her. Whether I want to see her, to hear her does not matter. She stares me down, daring me to ignore her ~ or try to ignore her. Her laugh is full and dry, a sandpaper drum.

How often  are we presented with the opportunity to confront our future? to face down our own fear of aging and of death? to befriend who and what we will become?

Possibilities abound. What qualities will grow? Wisdom? Silence? Vision? Voice? What will diminish? Need to be seen? Soft skin? Desire for admiration? Fear? A new adventure approaches, quietly, noisily, expectantly, surprisingly ~~ so many moments approaching and flowing around me.

What do you see in your future? How does age affect you? Do you embrace its approach? Do you reject it? Are you afraid of the changes that come with age? Have you had an opportunity to converse with and learn from your elders?