Be the Lighthouse

My latest Teabag Tarot took me by pleasant surprise today. By nature, I am clearly a dualist.... half light, half dark. I swing from one to the other and every stage and step in between.

When people tell me to change my beliefs, emotions or actions in some way, my first reaction is to dig in and refuse. I want to acknowledge what is currently true for me before stepping into the change space. Change is also part of my nature ~ early on in my life my mother called me Windy because my moods changed like or with the wind. I want to own the change myself. And I do. I swing back and forth ~ and I do it to my own tempo.

That made today's Teabag Tarot especially pertinent. It felt quixotic.... and it felt grounding. All at the same time. I look at what is most important to me, what feeds my soul, what rises out of the dark depths of my being. What I find in those depths is that gentle spreading of the light at dawn ~ or at the rise of the full moon. I love bathing in the often surprisingly soothing light of the full moon. Everything in me gets lighter. No matter what the situation around me, I find myself smiling, wanting to dance or prance in that light.

First, the light has to spread inside me ~ to fill my dark corners and brighten my senses. Then, I can stretch out and be the lighthouse. The light inside me beams out toward others. I know they see and feel it. It is reflected in them, in their responses to me. It's not particularly MY light or a glaringly bright light. It's gentle, accepting of where they are, helping to carry them on to the next place or moment or day.

Being a lighthouse means essentially two things: the light comes from within and it shines through the fog, the dark and the storm. There's no need for a lighthouse in the glaring noonday light or when everything is going our way. It's more important now than ever: when we are all in the midst of turmoil, darkness and change. I'll do what I can.

What are you doing to encourage the light within you? How are you being a lighthouse? Are you in need of a lighthouse? Where do you look to find that light? Who in your life spreads that light and encouragement? Are there moments when you can find the light within? and moments when you can't?

Magic of Beginnings

Do you remember the first day of a new school year? Maybe your senior year in high school? Or the first day you met your best friend? Those days reach deep into our memories because they hold the magic of beginnings.

I recall not the first day of meeting my best friend in high school, but the first day of our friendship. We were freshmen, working in the library, shelving books. We were teasing each other ~ about what, I'm not sure exactly ~ just banter. As she shelved a book titled The Ugly American, she said to me, This is what you are. I retorted, You too. And she replied, Oh, no. I am not an American. I was born in Germany. Somehow, that precise moment began something deeper. The joking around stopped ~ at least temporarily ~ while we began a new conversation about the more intimate features of our individual lives.

Then there was the day I went to visit a particular college campus. Applying to that university was linked to that high school friend. She was planning to go there. I hadn't even considered it. Then I did. When I set foot on the quad and walked under the trees, across the grassy spaciousness, it felt like home. The irony was that I completed my undergraduate degree there; my friend never attended a single day.

Beginnings. As 2016 begins, I look back at those quixotic moments that led me to turn a corner or a page or .... whatever diverse object or subject set before me .... and my entire world shifted accordingly. Though I have no set resolutions, I have a practice of watching for changes bubbling the surface and creating patterns. If I pay close attention and trust the process, the magic will show itself.

What beginning moments do you most vividly recall? Can you describe them in detail? Where did each of those moments lead you? What magic occurred for you? What are you watching happen as 2016 begins?